Damn. Gutshot.
I didn’t think he’d have the balls. I was sure he was just flashing the piece, making himself feel like a big man. Shows you what I know.
Bleeding bad. I can still move my legs, but it makes all the muscles hurt.
The flash, and then like a punch in the stomach. Everything inside me all turned to blood. Motherfucker. I didn’t think he’d have the balls.
I gotta get me a gun. I’ll cap his bullshit ass.
I gotta get me to a hospital, I guess.
I’m cold. Maybe I’ll rest here for a little bit.
Uh oh Randy, do you need me to call 911? Great take on the prompt.
I like the surprise you captured. So surprised I don’t think he realised that he is dying. Good story.
Gut shot is hard way to go. I think if it happened to me and I had a gun, I’d use it to move myself on to the next life a little faster. Well told tale.
Aloha,
Doug
Great language, great voice. He’s still spunky but it, sadly, won’t last long.
His final resting place maybe? Excellent!
Rosey Pinkerton’s blog
I like how his first thought is revenge, then a hospital, then just resting. A nice progression as reality inevitably sets in.
-David
Excellent! Sounds so realistic!
Fantastic. The voice and pace are gripping – his surprise and anger, the way he realises what’s happened, but doesn’t quite get the full impact, even at the end. Wonderful.