Me and Shorty Jim pulled into Mt. Pleasant on the Burlington about three in the morning. It was flat January, needle snow blowing cold enough to freeze your words right to your tongue so you had reach up and break ’em off to say anything. Usually we don’t go near a station, but it was that or die in the blizzard. In big cities like Chi, us road Joes ain’t welcome indoors, but little towns tend to be a might more friendly, especially when it’s life and death like it was that night. Stationmaster had that potbellied stove glowing red.
Great atmosphere. I could see your character
“Cold enough to freeze your words right to your tongue so you had reach up and break ’em off to say anything”. Have you heard this expression before or did you make it up? Either way I love it!
Made it up. Variation of the Paul Bunyan “So cold that when you set a pot of coffee out to cool it froze so fast the ice was hot.”
Love those words that others have already quoted. Such a word pic of the environment!
You did a fantastic job with the vernacular. It set the tone and that told more of the story than the narrative itself. Great piece.
Loved your take on this prompt
Outstanding. Words freezing to the tongue is my new favorite image. Love this piece.
Again, love your voice – so real and takes us right into your character. Love the idea it’s so cold, the words freeze – perfect. Great spin on the prompt